Improvement - imperialfool

Strategies to deal with doubt and negativism

“When in doubt, don´t” – Benjamin Franklin

I will fail. I won´t make it. I´m not able to achieve this. I can´t stand it anymore. I´m not worth it. I don´t have any friends. I´m all alone and helpless. I´ll never survive this. I´ll end as a drunk in a dark backstreet somewhere. Et cetera, et cetera.

 

Everybody knows days like this.

You wake up thinking negative thoughts and doubts about your life and your current situation and finding it hard to get out of that mindset. You may think that everybody is against you or even worse. There are good news about those thoughts: They are just thoughts so they are only there because you think them. But there are another good news:

 

Your thoughts are only true if you believe in them. That said you already know what to do right?? 

Change your thoughts. Change them into a direction where they don´t harm but instead help you achieve whatever it is you´re currently trying to accomplish.

 

An easy way to change your mindset and deal with doubt is to start some routines or habits right after waking up. This works perfectly for me. I usually read something inspirational or positive right after waking up to bring me in the right mood. You can also be thankful about anything – see the next list.

 

Reading something inspirational and positive:

 

What could you be thankful about:

  • life
  • health
  • beloved ones (family, friends, colleagues,…)
  • waking up in the morning
  • the first morning coffee
  • nature
  • fresh air
  • a good meal
  • the ability to read a good book
  • the possibility to change, IF we want to

 

Change your beliefs, once and for all

I told you already that I turned around 180 degrees this year. I was constantly thinking that bad things happen to me and that life is always hitting on me the hardest. I changed my mindset and now I believe that everything that I want to achieve, I will. Nobody can´t stop me from being who I wanna be, and with that in mind I don´t have any trouble dealing with doubt, fear and negative thoughts.

I cannot change your thoughts of course. That is your job, I can only give you something to think about and some tactics and a little guidance.

 

Know what you want and never doubt about it again!

Knowing what you want is the first step to freedom.

 

Life is to short for doubt and negativism.
Life the life you want, right now. Do what only what you love. Or at least try to avoid doing what makes you sick both physically and mentally.

  • Get up from your sofa.
  • Turn of the TV.
  • Turn of your computer and mobile devices.
  • Get out for a walk. Breathe.
  • Take a look around.
  • And take a look inside and find the beauty and wisdom within.

 

What do you want? Do you have a unfulfilled dreams? Do you wanna share them with us?

About Having and Giving

Funny how things start to change when you start to change your thoughts.

All of a sudden new customers appear from all quarters. It´s like I´m dreaming. “Can you make me a website?” “What about business cards?” “Do you offer personal coaching?” I now clearly see the law of attraction. I don´t think in terms of scarcity. I have everything I need, and if I need more, it will come. If it doesn’t, I don´t really need it. This philosophy is very handy! And it´s easy to include in our everyday life when one understands the perils associated with materialism.

 

I always lived with scarcity. I never had enough.

Or so I thought. I felt this way all the time, and nothing was good enough. But when I bought something, the pleasure it brought faded away very quickly. So I had to buy more and more things, blinded by the belief that filling my life with material objects was somehow cathartic. In fact, I had a professional guitar and a professional amp but I wasn´t a professional musician at all. I just thought I need this stuff to be a professional. Guess what? I was wrong. What’s more, I discovered that I had been wrong about many things throughout my life. I was a late bloomer, I guess. But it´s better to bloom late than never!

 

Apps, Ebooks and more

It was the same with apps and ebooks. It´s so easy to buy something very quickly considering that everyone with a smartphone maintains near-instant access to the world’s merchandisers whenever the impulse strikes. And you think, “It´s only 99 cents.” But it adds up. And do I really need 200 or more apps on my phone? Do I really need all this? I don´t think so. Of course, I wouldn´t give away my iPhone since it´s a very handy tool. But in reality, that’s all it is. And therein lies the paradox. A useful tool that implores many to rhetorically ask how man managed to live without them while simultaneously bringing the global marketplace – and unlimited materialism – to one’s fingertips.

 

Two apps I really need and recommend

  • iA Writer for iPhone and Mac.(I use this for writing articles for wordpress, for my variable costs list, and lots of other pages. It´s lightweight and comes without knick-knacks so I can concentrate on what´s really important. I also backup everything using dropbox and iA Writer, which is also very convenient.)
  • Wunderlist for iPhone and Mac. (It´s a very handy list manager tool for my ideas and lots more)

 

The media, family, friends and neighbors play a role in contributing to the consumption mindset, but the biggest contributor to my consumption was me.  

 

Nowadays I think before I buy something.

I read an article about “consumption” on zenhabits, which by the way is one of my favorite blogs, and where Leo Babauta wrote about a “30-day list.” I took his idea and included it in my daily routines. It’s such a simple method, but it never occurred to me. So every time I think I need something, I include it on my 30-day list. If I still think I need that item after 30 days, I buy it. But I don´t buy it directly. I first look on ebay and other platforms in search of used items. Thanks for that, Leo!

 

Variable costs

I also have a “variable costs” list. It might seem annoying but every single time I buy something, I put it on the list immediately. It has become a rule for me so I think twice before I buy something! This list is very helpful too. At the end of every month I see exactly how much I did spend on coffee, ebooks, music, tv shows  and so on. This gives me the transparency I need to estimate future expenses.

 

Give away stuff you don´t need

As I recently moved to another city, I gave away a lot of stuff I didn´t need or no longer used. There are some big online platforms which are all about giving. So I joined a community and gave away a lot of stuff and guess what, if felt devilishly good! I met a lot of people and most of them were very grateful, and I felt good about doing it. It´s a damn good feeling to give rather than to buy. Give it a try!

 

Stuff doesn´t bring you happiness

It´s always up to you as to how you feel. Nothing you buy will bring you freedom or happiness. (Well, not for long). You might think that a new car, a new laptop, a new house [put what you want in here!] will make you happy, but it won´t. It´s all up to you. I´m not suggesting that you cannot have nice things. Some things are good to have, but do you really need a new cellphone every year? Do you need the newest iPad in order to feel you fit in? It´s all just a big bubble and you are a part of it until you begin to see it for what it really is.

 

The Never Get Enough Society

How is it possible that we never get enough? This question was popping up while watching a TV show on the Food Channel. A guy on the verge of obesity was touring around America and eating lots of super duper sandwiches, burgers and huge steaks. I´m not mentioning the name of the show, but I just assume that you´ve seen it…

 

He also did some eating contests which shocked me. While over 1 billion people around the world live in poverty and are starving this guy is eating until he almost bursts…

Well, shocked is maybe the wrong word since I´m already familiar with such madness. But I was amazed that people can live like that and even more amazed that there is a tv-show displaying this behavior.

 

I cannot imagine being obese. And I certainly don´t want to imagine it. I was almost on the verge of obesity myself. My height was 178cm or 5 feet 10 and my weight was 90kg or 198pounds. Well, that was over 15 years ago but I can recall that time quite well.

 

I didn’t take part in any sport or exercise, I had a job where I was sitting almost the entire day drinking coffee with milk and sugar and smoking cigarettes, and I ate a lot of fast foods while avoiding fruit and vegetables.

 

It took me a while to realize that I was totally uncomfortable with my body, not to mention that the girls didn´t seem to show any interest in me either. At that time I was like the guy in the TV show, always eating as much and as fast as I could. And the worst thing was that I didn´t have any self esteem at all!

 

Why don´t we just listen to what our body has to say?
Are we so disconnected with it that we simply don´t realize how bad our body really feels?
It took me a long time to realize that I´m feeling very unhappy with myself, and it took even longer to take a step and start changing something about it.

 

I know in this society it´s all about faster, better and more, but maybe we should think twice.

 

Here is how I avoided getting obese

I cut a lot of unhealthy foods from my diet

  • Trans fats (french fries, fried stuff in general, chips)
  • Sugar (well not all, but most of it)
  • Bad oils & fat like margarine and hardened vegetable oil
  • Processed foods
  • Every food product I see on television
  • Stopped buying products from Nestle, Kraft and other Multinational Companys

On the other hand I began to

  • Only drink water & black coffee
  • Buy organic food
  • Buy at local markets
  • Buy only seasonal food
  • Eat a lot of veggies and fruits
  • Use Xylit instead of sugar
  • Eat 70% (or above) cocoa chocolate
  • Use only good oil: Olive, Linseed, Coconut

 

I began my new regimen at the beginning of 2013 and I have lost about 12 pounds already without starving! I also workout now that I have more energy then ever before. And I don´t feel guilty when I have a day where I eat a lot of chocolate because on most of my days I stick to my diet plan. (And the chocolate I eat isn´t bad at all!)

 

And since I started changing my whole eating habit I feel sorry for the old me and all the other people living the “never enough” lifestyle. It isn´t that hard to change but, like everything in life, it has to come from deep within you. You have to want it and soon you will feel much better. Diabetes and obesity shouldn´t be a topic for anybody whilst others are starving to death.

One of my favorite books you definitely should check out!

Well, if you read the about me page you already know that I hated my life and I recognized that I had to change something.

I had to change and I´m glad that I actually did!

I read Zen and the Art of Happiness from Chris Prentiss and although I’ve previously read similar books, Zen really did change me and my whole point of view. I read it and then I read it again and after that I read it again.

Even now, after I read it about 5 times or so, I like to sit down for a few minutes and read one or two chapters just to keep things in mind and reinforce those aspects I feel are paramount to my own personal improvement. I was a slave of my negative thoughts for over 30 years and I guess it takes time for my subconscious to soak up the positive ideas and concepts described in this great book.

It helped me a lot and I thank Chris Prentiss for this and all the other books he published. I would love to meet him some day as he has literally saved my life and for that I am very grateful! Thanks, Chris!

I recommend this book and hope you give it a try! I´m not trying to push random shit on my readers. I just want you to be as happy as I now am and let everyone know that this book has significantly contributed to my improved attitude and outlook on life!